Day 74 | A Harder Day

May 22, 2017

This morning I woke up sad and in a lot of pain. “What is wrong with me?” I thought. Whenever I experience a resurgence of old symptoms there’s always a nagging fear at the back of my head, “What if this improvement won’t last? What if I get really ill again?

I pushed that feeling aside and got up. Maybe I just contaminated the van with my own detoxing. We did have the doors and windows closed after all. I decided to get away from the van and go sit at a picnic table that was a little further away. I waited, with my face in my hands. “What is going on?!”

After a short while, I decided to walk around a bit. When I finally started feeling a little better, I mustered up the courage to prepare a simple breakfast, start the laundry and do dishes. I probably should have decontaminated but, for whatever reason, it didn’t occur to me. I bet I would have bounced back much faster!

Then it started raining so we went back into the van and I worked on setting up my new phone. It’s going to be so nice to be able to write whenever the inspiration hits!

I really wanted to cook lunch myself today but by the time lunch rolled around, I felt so overwhelmed by the prospect of cooking that I wanted to cry. I hadn’t cooked anything in years! Not to mention, I had never cooked on a camp stove in my life.

Thankfully, my sweet man came to the rescue and offered to cook for us. I could just watch how he did it. It didn’t look too hard and I started to feel like maybe I really could do it next time.

After lunch, Brett worked until dinner time while I washed dishes and continued doing the laundry. The laundry takes hours every day but I don’t mind it too much. It’s kind of relaxing. Sometimes by the end though, my forearms start aching from wringing out so many things one by one. I can’t wait until our new spin dryer arrives! It’s this amazing contraption that basically wrings out the laundry for you. Laundry is going to seem so easy once we get that!

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  • Chris Barratt

    Ana, I’m sorry you had a tough day. But when I think of how far you’ve came it brings hope of going even further. So don`t despair when a small setback happens. Your body is still healing and setbacks might happen. But the healing will still continue. I’m sure God wouldn’t bring you this far to stop now. Ana, you’re an inspiration!!! And so many of us are still praying for you!!! Hugs!!

    June 1, 2017 at 8:05 pm Reply
    • Ana Harris

      Aww… Thanks so much Chris! Good to hear from you! 💕

      June 2, 2017 at 4:16 pm Reply
  • Grandma Zimmerman

    HAPPY Anniversary, Ana & Brett!! Praying this will be a really good day. I’m guessing this will be your best anniversary yet! Love you and miss you, Hugs.

    June 2, 2017 at 5:29 am Reply
    • Ana Harris

      Thank you so much Grandma! I love you!💕

      June 2, 2017 at 4:18 pm Reply
  • Chris

    Happy Anniversary Ana and Brett!! May the Lord bless you both mightily as you continue to live for Him!! And may He give you a really great day together!!

    June 2, 2017 at 8:09 am Reply
  • ashley nicole

    I just wanted to let you know that I’m praying for you Anna! You’re a strong girl and though recovery is sometimes slow, you’re moving along nicely!

    June 2, 2017 at 11:12 am Reply
    • Ana Harris

      Thanks so much Ashley! I really appreciate the prayers!

      June 2, 2017 at 4:18 pm Reply
  • Denise

    Ana I am sorry to hear about how crumby your day was yesterday.

    I totally get how it can be discouraging when those bad days come. I am on a similar yet different journey of healing.

    I have suffered from migraines for 18 years. This February I started seeing 2 migraine specialists. This has been an up and down journey some days good and then a bad day or week hits or even a new symptom pops up that I’ve never had before.

    Don’t be discouraged by those few bad days on your healing journey, keep reflecting on how far God has brought you and know that the best is yet to come.

    I am doing this too and not loosing heart as I journey upward to healing.

    Thank you for sharing.

    And Happy Anniversary sweet Ana and Brett!!

    Praying for you two <3

    June 2, 2017 at 3:16 pm Reply
  • Bethany

    Happy Anniversary to you both. May God continue to give you grace on difficult days. Thankful for the healing you have seen and praying you will continue to heal. We miss you both.

    June 2, 2017 at 8:29 pm Reply
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