Day 92 | Not My Favorite Day

June 9, 2017

This morning I woke up feeling tired and sore. Plus, our new neighbors were having a birthday party at 7:00am! I tried to keep sleeping but wasn’t able to and that made me feel a bit grouchy. How I wished they would be quiet! If only I had earplugs!

After trying to sleep for two hours, I decided to just get up and start the day’s work. Unfortunately, I found that something was wrong with my body. I was exhausted, my body ached, my muscles felt heavy and it took about 10 times more energy than normal to do everything.

Decontaminating didn’t seem to help and I started to suspect that maybe our new neighbors had introduced some contamination into our air. Brett suggested I try walking up the hill and sit at the picnic table several campsites away. I agreed and my suspicion was confirmed when I seemed to feel a little better. Bummer! We’re going to have to move!

When I told Brett, he went into the office building to see if the campsite further up the hill was available. Thankfully, it was! I was too tired to do much to help move and Brett was really sweet about it. He told me he would take care of it so that I could go rest.

I walked up to the new campsite and sat down. I found that I was too tired to even sit up so I just laid down on the picnic table. I closed my eyes trying to forget all the work I was supposed to be doing… No use adding stress to sickness.

Eventually, I got up again and forced myself to get the bare minimum laundry done. I couldn’t bear to fall behind! I really needed to keep making progress on my family’s clothes! I was feeling quite weak though and had to use an empty laundry tub to fill the other tubs in manageable chunks. That way I didn’t have to carry too much water all at once.

By the time I got the load up on the line I was so exhausted I felt like crying. I decided I should probably shower and call it quits. I hadn’t decontaminated since we switched spots and the cross-contamination was probably still affecting me.

As I was getting the water heated for my shower, I really did cry. I just couldn’t take it anymore. I felt so awful! I didn’t even think I had enough strength left over to shower.

“Why does this keep happening? I hate the unpredictability! To think that any moment some moldy new campers can come, make me sick and force us to move! I’m so tired of this! I wish we had our own land!”

I finally mustered up the courage to shower and after I was done I crawled into bed. My dear husband made dinner for us and I spent the rest of the evening in bed. It felt good to rest!

Today was really hard, but as I was reflecting on the day, it struck me that a bad day of mold avoidance is way better than the “good days” I had in Portland or Ithaca. If I had, had a day like today a year ago, I would have considered it an unusually good day!

So even though it wasn’t fun, I have a lot to be thankful for! The locations effectย has completely shifted my energy baseline so that the kind of crushing exhaustion I faced today doesn’t feel normal anymore. That’s incredible progress!


By the way, Brett and I made a beautiful PDF of my favorite resources for suffering souls. I created the content and he made it look fancy with his superduper graphic design skills. It’s available for free to my email subscribers. Click here to sign up and receive 5 Resources for the Suffering Soul.

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11 Comments

  • Grandma Zimmerman

    Sorry you had to have rough day. Continuing to pray for complete healing and also that things
    will go well for you all when your family gets there. Wishing you all a fun filled time together.
    Love you all!

    June 13, 2017 at 10:09 am Reply
    • Ana Harris

      Aww… Thank you! I can’t wait to see them! ๐Ÿ˜Š

      June 14, 2017 at 6:14 pm Reply
  • Lizbeth E.

    Aww, I’m so sorry! I’ll pray you feel stronger soon!

    June 13, 2017 at 10:44 am Reply
    • Ana Harris

      Thank you so much Lizbeth. ๐Ÿ’•

      June 14, 2017 at 6:15 pm Reply
  • Natalie Julson

    Praying for you Ana.

    June 13, 2017 at 11:04 am Reply
  • Marita Wilson

    Phew. It sounds exhausting. I’m tired just reading about it. You do look very peaceful on that bench, though. ๐Ÿ™‚

    June 13, 2017 at 12:45 pm Reply
    • Ana Harris

      Haha! ๐Ÿ˜Š

      June 14, 2017 at 6:15 pm Reply
  • Erin

    Aw…I’m sorry you had such a bad day…or maybe I should say a good day? ๐Ÿ˜‰ I can’t wait to see photos of your dog and family!!!

    June 13, 2017 at 4:58 pm Reply
    • Ana Harris

      ๐Ÿ˜Š

      June 14, 2017 at 6:15 pm Reply
  • James

    The unpredictability is the worst. At least you are able to re-frame the situation to realize a bad day today would have been a really good day a year ago, and that you are making great progress. If you ever do buy some earplugs I highly recommend the Hearos brand ones, they are very comfortable compared to other ones.

    June 13, 2017 at 11:45 pm Reply
    • Ana Harris

      Thanks James! I used to have a box of Hearos earplugs back when my sound sensitivity was really brutal.

      June 14, 2017 at 6:16 pm Reply

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